Clouds & Stars
and us!!!
her complications
cloudy head and starlit heart
will carry her high
I don’t believe it was love at first sight, but somewhere along the way, I became an enormous lover of clouds. Maybe when I first saw them from a plane window, and I almost believed I could reach out and touch them – grab a handful and let it melt in my mouth, like clouds really were candy floss. Maybe earlier, when I lay on the grass – much too long ago to have had the bad habit of scrolling – and I noticed their shapes, their patterns telling special stories. However I wanted to describe them: beautiful fluff, sky’s whispers, characters in the blue – clouds kindly reminded me that imperfections make us real. Last year in Thailand, I got a smiley cloud tattooed – the perfect inked companion to stick around for the future, never leaving my inner arm.
And then there’s stars, which make me gasp when they become visible in multitudes. Constellations that dazzle. I vividly remember the first and only shooting star my eyes witnessed – somewhere in Poland, in the middle of summer. I was gushing about life with a girl next to me, and we just so happened to look up from the bonfire simultaneously – seeing the dancing vision was a first for us both and I delighted in how she was as starstruck as I was. The memory sticks to me, accompanied by the sound of Micah strumming her guitar. I’ve since learnt we’re made of stardust – it seems like something I should have already known. How could I have gone so long not knowing something so simple and beautiful? We’re stars, we’re stars, we’re stars, my thoughts spun.
It was a truth that made so much sense, and I saw it in stargirls who dared to shine brightest. I reached out to one of them last week – I've never met her, but being publicly queer on IG back in the day meant becoming connected to some beautiful starry souls, whose faces still pop up on my timeline when I pay the app a visit. Theresa is one of those girls, THE stargirl, and this is what she had to say about it:
“Stars unlock perspective. Perspective of the past, present and future. Perspective of our world, other worlds and the space in between. Being a stargirl is living in that space. The space that allows you to truly enjoy existing on earth and create your own meaning with the perspective that we all are humans on a rock, a spec of dust in the universe and that nothing matters there so everything matters.” - Theresa (@theresakost)
Nothing matters there so everything matters. How I love the way we all matter. How we’re like clouds floating through life in different directions. How we create a map of stars through twinkling, honest art.
I had an impulse to extend an open invitation for collaboration on this post, because to be with the clouds or the stars is to be surrounded by those you’re connected to. And I’m so grateful to have connections – people to share words and experiences with; people who also feel attached to the atmosphere in some way. So here’s some timeless poetry for you to savour, no matter what time your clock says it is:
By kit:
blooming dark and blue
plumes billow and brood over the trees
fresh watercolour daubed along the horizon.
always, a silver lining.
above, twinkling specks of diamond
listen; they speak, beauty divine.
below, she looks up, transfixed
as if trying to take the simple majesty in.
By chels:
After the football game
My sister has to pee
But I leave the child lock on
Until she and I both look up
At the majesty of the heavens
Before running inside
we exist so we can love by Anoushka
i look up at the sky and
i ask my mom, “why do stars exist?”
“i don’t know,” she tells me. “why do you and i exist?”
“why do we?” she tells me to stop
with my incessant questioning
but when i grow up, i find out why:
it’s so we can dig in the dirt, get our fingers dirty;
look up at the sky and wonder
at how our bodies are built out of stardust;
lie on our backs, clothes against grass
shirt made out of cotton born from the plants,
and find stories in the clouds–
faces of people we’ve met
but never really known.
it’s so we can sing and dance,
eat ice cream and laugh.
we’re born to the earth, to the sky, to the clouds
children of the grass, the stars, the wind, the trees, the woods
we’re born with a blood-red heart
pumping love into every artery and vein
hardwired to care for everything that surrounds us
to find stories in all that is mundane
it’s just that we forget to, sometimes.
By Myelin:
Although trillions of stars form the milky way,
We can only see about 4000 stars from Earth.
We see different stars depending on where we are in the world:
For example, the Great Bear
Is only visible in the Northern hemisphere.
The only constellation that I can recognize,
The one I look for in the dark,
Can’t be seen nor appreciated by everyone when they search the night.
There is something that is always watching over us at night,
Sometimes she even visits us during the day,
Something nearly every human who has lived has seen or heard of.
How comforting is it to know
That our ancestors and our descendants
Have seen or will see her white eye.
Even if we don’t see the same stars, we are all connected
By the moon in the black sky.
🌟
When I look at her, I look at you.
When I smile at her, I smile at you.
Kallulo Taaralu — Stars in Her Eyes by Samira EG ᢉ𐭩
thana kallulo taaralu
aa merupu asalu oohinchalevu
thanu naa vaipu choosinappudu,
naa oopiri inka hrudayam
reparepaduthu aa meghalu tho kalisopothai
🌟
stars reside in her eyes
more brilliant than you can even imagine
when she looks my way,
my breath and my heart
flutter and merge with the clouds.
The clouds of my childhood by El
I flew my kite on the green outside my house
Watched it dip to and fro with the wind
Ran joyously, arms outstretched
☁️
Framed by the clouds of my childhood
Primary colours against vivid clouds
Clouds that seemed alive
3D against brilliant blue skies
Their depth and shadows mesmerised me
Reminding me of my place in the world.
☁️
Now, I look up and see a vast, grey expanse
The blue skies and my toy story clouds
Lost behind a new haze
☁️
When the murk occasionally fades
I glimpse the blue, bright white
Holding my breath in hope
Then they are hidden again
Leaving me dizzy, without compass
Feet unsteady.
☁️
Until, half the world away
As the plane descended
My eyes opened to see them in thousands
I breathed deeply
Light running through my veins
☁️
‘Here we are,
here you are,
exactly where you’re meant to be.’
By becca:
the evening air is warmer than i expected.
the clouds are thick, but not complete, and despite the streetlights,
i can still see a star or two.
i walk past bright buildings and well-lit lawns,
searching for a spot of darkness, though
i know that this is not the sky of my childhood.
that sky was full, glittering. there were frogs singing
and wildflowers growing. planets visible to the naked eye
and constellations dancing in true darkness.
here, i make out the faintest sight of three stars
all in a row. orion. the same design inked into my arm
shivers in recognition. the rest of him i cannot see.
in my mind, i hold both skies. tonight’s clouded, blue-ish,
empty one. and the one of twenty years ago,
vast, twinkling, and, at times, terrifying in its enormity,
but familiar nonetheless.
Twinkle, twinkle by ellen ☆
You bought me
a star on a chain.
A shining star,
for your
shining star.
Whenever my fingers
brush lightly against the clasp,
I think of
wishes to
come true.
My shining star
reminds me of all the
brilliant, shining, stars
behind me,
around me.
Look up there,
deep in the sky tonight.
See me shine.
Maybe I’ll
even wink.
I am there,
just under the radiant moon,
basking in glory.
I’ll always
be here.
I burn up
brighter than the brightest light,
trying to fill
our world
with joy.
I hope that
I light up your life
the same way
you do
to mine.
Clouds and stars get the chance to exist everywhere, and anywhere, no matter their look or shape or if they choose to stay hidden. We get to exist everywhere and anywhere too (no matter our look or shape, or if we choose to stay hidden). In a world that sometimes seems hateful, I hope these words remind you of the good. I also hope that when you read our words, you don’t feel a need to escape somewhere – that you feel like you’re enough where you are and that we’re all together somewhere.
Thank you so much for reading – remember to look up!
what a pretty read! i know ‘pretty’ is a weird way to describe writing but i did find it very pretty. your care & love for the people you collabed with is evident. enjoyed it.
this was so so so amazing and such a joy to read!!!! i love your mini essay at the beginning you're such a fabulous writer, and the beautiful photos (!!!) and every single poem!!!!! thank you so much for putting this all together 💗